| “ | I can see now why the real Riding Hood was so quick to fall deeply in love with you. She still talks about you from time to time -- and not just under questioning. Doesn't know you survived, of course. | „ |
| ~ Baba Yaga |
"The Letter: Chapter Five of March of the Wooden Soldiers" is the twenty-fourth issue of Fables, with a cover date of June, 2004. It was published on April 14, 2004.
Synopsis
Boy Blue has gone missing. Trouble is brewing up at the Farm, and Bigby is still out of town. The residents of Fabletown are about to get a seriously rude awakening when the brothers Hugh, Drew and Lou show up with a gun-toting ultimatum--and the bodies begin to pile up.
Plot
Morning arrives on the Farm, and Rose Red comes out of the barn after spending half the night helping Weyland repair the tractor, though Bo Peep's sheep has other ideas about what they were up to. Rose meets up with Stinky, the badger, on her way to the farmhouse to relieve Mustard Pot Pete for the day. Pete points out there were many complaints last night that he had to file. Most of them concern the old cottage previously owned by Baba Yaga, springing to life after hundreds of years and rampaging around the Farm on its chicken legs. A posse of animals are still trying to rope it down.
Meanwhile, Snow White is starting to get concerned about Boy Blue. He hasn't been at work for five days, and no one else has seen him since he wandered off with Red Riding Hood.
Boy Blue is currently strapped to a chair, bruised and scarred from five days of torture. The faux Riding Hood admits she's impressed that Blue held out for so long. He successfully ruined her original plan, to stay among the Fabletown community for years, learning their secrets and reporting back the Adversary. Unfortunately for her, he and Bigby Wolf knew the original Red Riding Hood too well to be fooled by her act. So now, she is improvising. "Riding Hood" tells her wooden subordinates that she still has one further use for Boy Blue...
Snow White receives a late night phone call from Bigby. He is at the Canadian gate to the Homelands, where the Fable guards are all dead. The gate has been opened from the other side. Worse, there are several tracks in the snow that suggest at least three large and heavily-loaded trucks had left from the gateway. Bigby fears it could mean an invasion is heading to Fabletown, and he tells Snow to lock everything down. He will get there as soon as he can, but first, he needs to destroy the gate. Until then, it is up to Snow to hold down the fort.
The Fables gathered together in the Business Office are in a state of panic. There hasn't been a lock-down drill in ages, and no one can remember what to do! Snow White speaks calmly to the group, reminding them there is still time to prepare before any battle starts. First they need to send a communication to the Farm, then she'll speak to the 13th Floor witches to discuss their part in the battle.
Her rallying speech is suddenly interrupted by a gunshot. The crowd follows her as Snow rushes to the front lobby to find out what has happened. Jack shouts that they came back, the thugs that beat him up. And when they round the corner, they see the three wooden soldiers, wearing their black suits, with a badly injured Boy Blue draped around one's shoulder. Trusty John has been shot and lies bleeding near the front door. The wooden men toss Boy Blue to Snow White's feet, as a sign of their peaceful intent. They then begin reading from a rolled-up parchment, from the Adversary himself. The Emperor, as the Adversary is called by his loyal subjects, has declared that Fabletown be allowed to keep its independence for now, though in a show of good faith, all magical artifacts taken from the Homelands must be returned. A large battalion will arrive in Fabletown tomorrow to retrieve the items, any resistance will be severely dealt with. The wooden men hand the letter to Snow White. They also add that as new information had just reached them, Pinocchio must also be handed over tomorrow. He is the first crafted, their eldest brother and they want him back in their family, despite his horrible curse of humanity. At last they depart, leaving Snow White and the others feeling a new sense of uneasiness. Snow tells Flycatcher and Pinocchio to take Boy Blue to the hospital, then to come back as quickly as they can. There is much to do.
Later that night, Flycatcher walks into Pinocchio's room to tell him that Dr. Swineheart called. Blue should make a full recovery. Pinocchio doesn't even flinch, as if he didn't hear him. Flycatcher notices him packing his suitcase. Pinocchio tells him he's leaving with the battalion tomorrow. He knows firsthand that wooden soldiers are very tough to beat, they never eat, they never tire, they feel no pain, to fight them off would be incredibly dangerous. And besides that, there is one other reason he has to go. Pinocchio becomes teary eyed as he tells Flycatcher that the wooden men's existence meant his father Geppetto had to have created them... that he was still alive and a slave to the Adversary...
Appearing in "The Letter"
Featured Characters:
Supporting Characters:
- Stinky
- Mustard Pot Pete
- Pinocchio
- Flycatcher
- King Cole
- Lady Beauty
- Lord Beast
- Prince Charming
- Jack Horner
Antagonists:
- Baba Yaga (Posing as Red Riding Hood)
- Wooden soldiers
- Hugh
- Drew
- Lou
Other Characters:
- Bufkin
- Cinderella
- Grimble
- Hobbes
- Johnny, Donny and Lonny
- Miss Muffet
- Mouse Police
- Reynard
- Thrushbeard
- Trusty John
- Weyland Smith
Locations:
- New York
- The Farm
- Baba Yaga's Hut
- New York City
- The Farm
- Canada
Items:
Continuity
- Stinky states that he bequeathed with his nickname after an encounter with Missy Skunk. According to Stinky, he fell down her hole once, which shouldn't be enough to warrant such a disreputable nickname. Rose Red labels the encounter as an interspecies romance, but Stinky claims there was no romance because she was a skunk. However, in Fables #125 — "Riding in Cars with Gods: Chapter One of Snow White," he reveals to Bigby Wolf that he actually doesn't mind the sobriquet. He confesses that his tumble into Missy Skunk's den was not an accident: In a drunken stupor, he found her alluring and she used her charm to seduce him.
- The fake Red mentions that the "real" Red Riding Hood still talks about Boy Blue. This was either a lie to taunt him, or it was simply retconned in Fables #41 — "Pax Imperium: Chapter Five of Homelands," as the real Red Riding Hood never even met Boy Blue.